Do you have to be bisexual to be a swinger?

Bisexual Swinging: Myths, Magic, and the Mighty Unicorn

Alright, let’s rip off the bed sheets and get into something that’s got a lot of new (and even some seasoned) swingers scratching their heads: bisexuality in the lifestyle. Whether you’re curious, confused, or just here for the alliteration, let’s clear up some common questions with a wink and a whip crack.

What’s a Unicorn, and Can I Pet One?

In swinging, a unicorn isn’t just a sparkly horse your niece is obsessed with. It’s a mythical (but very real) person—usually a bisexual single woman—who is open to playing with both partners in a couple. The reason they're called unicorns? Because they’re rare, magical, and everyone wants one.

But here’s where it gets spicy: some folks think “bisexual” and “unicorn” are interchangeable. Not quite. Bisexuality just means you're into more than one gender. A unicorn is a specific role someone plays in the lifestyle dynamic—most often joining couples. A bisexual guy? Not a unicorn. Still magical? Absolutely. But in a different glittery way.

Do You Have to Be Bisexual to Be a Swinger?

Nope. Nada. Not even a little.

You can be 100% straight and still have a rocking, writhing time in the lifestyle. Swinging isn’t about sexual orientation—it’s about openness, communication, and consensual fun. Some people swap only with opposite-sex partners. Others mix it up. Some stick to same-room play without touching anyone but their partner. Others are like, “I’m equal-opportunity horny.”

Bisexuality can open more doors in the lifestyle, sure—more people to play with means more possibilities—but it’s not required. You don’t need to check a sexuality box to get in the door. All you need is a good attitude, some social skills, and a working understanding of boundaries (yours and other people’s).

Can Men Be Bisexual in Swinging?

Simple answer: yes.

More complex answer: Mostly. Some parts of the lifestyle can still be stuck in the 1950s, where girl-on-girl is hot, but guy-on-guy makes people clutch their pearls. But the times, they are a-swingin’. There’s absolutely a place for bisexual men in the lifestyle—though, fair warning, it might not be at every party. Some swinger events are more hetero-normie than others, and that can mean bisexual guys might feel like they have to keep it zipped up. If you’re a bisexual male and you’re considering going to an event, asks the hosts/promoters what their rules are about bi-male play. Some welcome it, others will openly tell you its off-limits. Then you can make the choice to attend once you have that information based on your desires.

But increasingly, people are getting over the double standards. More clubs, parties, and events are being created to celebrate bisexuality across the board. Bi-friendly events are becoming more common, with events such as Bi F*ck Fest in Palm Springs to full bi-hotel takeovers in Miami growing each year. So if you’re a guy into guys (and gals, and maybe non-binary folks), you're not only valid—you’re invited. You just might have to shop around a bit for the right vibe.

As for how common bisexuality is, especially among men? It’s a lot more common than people say. There’s still a bit of taboo, so many dudes don’t put it on their swinger profile—even if they’re curious, open-minded, or have a “bi side that comes out with the right couple.” (That’s lifestyle code for: yes, but don’t out me on the dance floor, please.)

Women tend to be more open about bi play—because it’s more socially accepted and often encouraged in the lifestyle. But trust: plenty of men are exploring or interested in bisexual play. The numbers are bigger than you think... they’re just not all waving rainbow flags about it. Yet.

Bisexuality in the swinging world is real, welcome, and slowly shedding its weird stigma. Whether you’re bi, bi-curious, or just want to make out with someone who smells nice and brings snacks, there’s a place for you.

Find your people. Respect boundaries. Don’t assume anything without talking. And remember—no matter what your flavor of sexy is, there’s someone out there who wants a taste.

Just maybe don’t call yourself a unicorn unless you own a glitter harness.

Then there’s always the last type of sexuality in this realm...